Why? Because, as I have learned from reading posts and comments here and here the last few days, all is not well in BlogLand. The question of whether “We” should be getting free trips and interviews on the news and pieces published in books and magazines is once again up for debate, and it makes my heart feel very, very heavy.
I want to make something crystal clear to all my readers-I do not think I am “better” than any other blogger. When I write posts about being invited to blogger events, about what I’m packing for the trip, about what gifts were bestowed upon me, I am NOT trying to make anyone else feel bad, and if I have, I am sincerely sorry. I don’t look at it like bragging, I look at it as me sharing good news with my readers. I am just as happy when other bloggers get invited places and get free stuff as I am for myself. And sure, it bothers me when I read that other bloggers think that the bloggers I look up to are “pimping’ themselves out. Good gods, people! Why can’t we be supportive of each other?
There was a comment left on Rita’s post at Surrender, Dorothy that really upset me. Rita is publishing an anthology of stories written by a terrific group of bloggers, and the commenter referred to that group as “tired, pimping whores”. My GOD. I don’t know if that blogger is upset that she wasn’t chosen to be included, but she sure felt the need to say some pretty mean things about it. It’s like I can close my eyes and feel the collective eye-rolling, the groaning about how Mommybloggers are SO narcissistic, that we are all just marching in a huge “you’re pretty, no, YOU’RE pretty” parade. Well, SO WHAT?
I’m going to give you a list now of the bloggers that I PERSONALLY have admired for years, whose blogs I subscribe to, for no other reason than because I want to spread some love their way. Ready?
Dooce
Amalah
Fussy
Finslippy
Suburban Bliss
Sweetney (and please read her post Mom Pimps ‘R Us because it is much more eloquent than this one)
Mom101
Mothergoosemouse
Motherhood Uncensored
IzzyMom
State of Grace
Jen and Tonic
Are those the only blogs I think are worthy of mentioning? Hell no! But if I listed every single blogger whose writing kicks major ass, this post would be two pages long
Now, I don’t expect you to run right over to Bloglines and change all your feed subscriptions. There are ONE HUNDRED MILLION blogs, and it is statistically impossible that everyone will like all the same blogs. Some of the bloggers on that list have never, EVER even visited my blog let alone left me a comment. But I don’t care about that, because I like THEM. THEY like other blogs. THOSE bloggers like a different bunch of blogs, and so on and so on.
If you read this blog with any regularity, I assume it’s because you like what I have to say. You know that sometimes I write personal posts, and sometimes I write reviews. I tell you about DVDs I’ve watched, I post photos of my kids. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but I wouldn’t still be here almost three years later if NO ONE was reading. Yes, I have a separate product review blog, but the traffic on this blog is good enough that advertisers sometimes prefer this one. I’m careful to only choose products and websites that I think are a good fit. And that’s what the comments are for anyway! If I ever post something that you think is just completely bizarre, SAY SO. I can’t learn from my mistakes if no one points them out.
I started this blog because I wanted to share my experiences with other Moms. And I still do! Do I have a responsibility to protect Table for Five and what it stands for? Absolutely. Should I let every other blogger on the planet dictate what I can and can’t publish here? No freaking way. If I am going to declare myself to be a Mommyblogger, do I have a responsibility to that group to contribute to it in a positive way? Yes, I believe I do, but not at the expense of changing who I am.
So what’s my point in all of this? It’s to say that yes, I sometimes get free trips because I am a blogger. I get free stuff from companies who want my opinion and hope I will blog about their product and get some of you to click through and maybe buy that product too. Does that make me a “pimp” or a “whore”? Well, I certainly don’t think so, and I hope you don’t either. I have worked and continue to work very, very hard on my blogs, harder than most people probably realize, and if that means that I’m starting to get a little recognition and a few rewards for it, then I say, YAY ME.
If that makes me a whore, well then, pass me the hooker heels and get. in. LINE.












Hello and welcome to Table for Five! I'm Elizabeth, and this blog started in September 2005 as a way for me to participate in the Mommy Blogging community. I'm married with three terrific kids-boys ages 11 and 9 and a 2 year old daughter. Things I love include my family, coffee, Diet Coke, TV, reading, and Target.
Please contact me at table4five AT gmail DOT com if you would like to discuss anything I've posted here, place a text or button ad, send me a product to review, or provide a guest post. Thank you for stopping by!
Very well said.
It amazes me how high school always seem to be waiting right around the corner. Ready to pounce with all of its cattiness…
I say, more power to you! ;0)
Blessings,
Karla
what? I’m not on your list? pffffffttt.
I declare I shall never read your blog again. *stomps foot, makes a face, and runs away laughing like a loonie bird.*
Okay, I’m better now. LOL
You’re so right. Somebody somewhere is always ticked off about somebody else’s blog or somebody getting some free thing or whatever….. and I agree with you. Phooey on them, who needs their grouchy opinion anyway?
I want to be in the parade, but if I wear those shoes I think you’ll be carrying me on a stretcher with broken ankles -lol-
Lorettas last blog post..have you met sparky at Social Spark yet?
I have those shoes. Is that a bad thing???
Now, while I don’t get free trips and I certainly don’t think of myself as a Mommy Blogger (even if IThinkThereforeIBlog.com is, well, pretty much about being a mom/wife), I can’t imagine why people would begrudge your receipt of free trips.
Not when they are so many other things to be ticked off about.
Like, say, why *I* didn’t make your list.
::cough::
Venomous Kates last blog post..The Beefcake Beneath The Bisht
I say, “Yay, you!” It’s good to get rewards for the things you do. I like being able to say, “My friend, Elizabeth, blah, blah, blah.” Just knowing you makes me feel important.
I love reading about all the cool things you do.
Annas last blog post..Learn About Sudden Cardiac Arrest
Those shoes remind me of Chris Rock - “The number one job of a father is to keep his daughter off the pole.” (or something like that!).
I say if your blogging fulfills you, don’t worry about the haters.
Love the new design, by the way.
Dianas last blog post..The State of My Sexuality
When you are finished with those shoes my husband asks that I borrow them.
love you!
Alli ~Mrs. Fussypantss last blog post..Fight the Frump -Long Live the Capri
I just wish *I* was getting free stuff! I’d totally pimp that stuff out.
Of course I’m jealous. I also regret stopping blogging regularly for a really long time. I missed out on the big explosion in the PR thing, but I don’t begrudge those that made it just because I shot myself in the foot.
These big bruhahas blow up in cycles. This one will blow over and it will be another one a few months after that. The more things change the more they stay the same.
Sleeping Mommys last blog post..Are you done yet?
I am not a mommy blogger but I read your blog regularly and I don’t see any pimping done here. I believe that is just plain old jealousy on the part of the mean person who said that thing.
More power to your blog and keep sharing good news to us!
sashas last blog post..Falling into the trap again and again
Karla-Thank you for those kind words!
And yes, at my age, I am so over worrying if I’m “popular” or not.
I say if people don’t like that I am going on free trips, then don’t read my blog! If they don’t like my tweets about it, then un-follow me. You know? : )
Steph
Adventures In Babywearings last blog post..Just What Kind Of Bun Is In My Oven?
I am totally on your side… at the same time, I think if we invite people to comment, we can’t be upset if they choose to write something negative. It’s representative of some (in this case very SMALL) percentage of other people’s opinions out there. There are a lot of lurkers, who knows what people *really* think… but I agree with your views on this one.
that girls last blog post..Knock-knock-knockin’ on Shauna’s door…
Aww Elizabeth you are sweet to include me in that list that I feel out of place in. I know it is pollyanna of me, but why can’t we or them or whatever, be as kind as nice as you have always been to other bloggers. Good on you for setting an example in how to be nice.
Very well said.
This reminds me of the 6th and 8th graders that I taught the last few years (all girls). People really need to grow up and stop pointing fingers and calling each other names. Sure, I admit I was a little jealous of your trip. Was it because of it being free and all of the things that you received? Nope, it was because I wish I was back at Disney World too. It reminded me of the great memories from the past. I am thrilled that you shared your photos and experiences so I could be there with you.
So if doing a great job and being rewarded for your work means you are a pimp, then wear those heels proudly and strut your stuff!
TheAngelForevers last blog post..Turtles, Dinos & Bears. . . oh my!
I think it’s great when companies notice our mom blogs, the people we reach and decide to give us free stuff for mentioning them. I’m all for it. On my review blog, sometimes I am sent products to try, review and keep and sometimes I write paid reviews. I am always honest in my opinions and I don’t consider myself a whore. One time I reviewed a book I had read just because I wanted to. The author of the book sent me a Pajamagram and if that’s not cool, I don’t know what it is!
Keep on blogging as you have been, there’s no way to make everyone happy!
Sheilas last blog post..My Designs
Hooray for you for getting free trips and stuff. If I’m mad it’s because I didn’t get on the blogging bandwagon - it’d be nice to get rewarded for doing what you are already doing - more power to you! It’s great seeing a local gal (I’m in EL) get some fun goodies!
Bravo!! Bravo!!
Free Stuff works for me and if I just have to write my lttle ol’ review in exchange for it, well that ain’t so bad.
Yay you, indeed!
Thanks for the love, Elizabeth. Back atcha.
mothergoosemouses last blog post..Meeting my mother in the middle
Good for you Elizabeth, and boy am I honored to be included here.
Don’t ever feel like you ever have to defend anything you write about your life especially to the whiner in question. Trips you take (whether free or not), what you pack, the deodorant you choice, the lint in your belly button is all the fabric of your life and in the context of a personal blog, well, that’s your raw material missy.
Mom101s last blog post..The Agony of the Feet.
I don’t think you should have to defend what you read - seriously.. sometimes people really lose perspective on blogging. Enjoy your trips!!
hollis last blog post..fake flying. [Flickr]
I guess I am behind the times because I thought a bunch of bloggers met at DL for fun, lol, I didn’t know it was a sponsored trip. That is awesome!
Makes me want to strive for it one day, not be mad at you for getting it.
It is similar to the bloggy giveaways. People get MAD that people win more than one thing. There is no way to rig it and everyone has the same opporutunity to enter all the giveaways, but someone actually had the gall to suggest my friend should be giving her prizes away to be “fair.”
This is not a utopia, and it is FAIR to enter and randomly win. It is not fair to have to give up your prizes because someone is whining.
Enjoy your trips and freebies and ignore the whiners.
Qtpies7~s last blog post..When it rains, it pours or Sam couldn’t be topped by Drew
What a bunch of poo (get it Pooh, OK I’ll keep my humor or lack of it to myself)! It really shows someone’s character when that green monster comes out.
I’m like Anna. I brag about what you get to do. The difference is I know that it’s all through hard work. More power to you!
What a bunch of poo (get it Pooh, OK I’ll keep my humor or lack of it to myself)! It really shows someone’s character when that green monster comes out.
I’m like Anna. I brag about what you get to do. The difference is I know that it’s all through hard work. More power to you!
Connies last blog post..Womens’ Shelters
I would not have met you if it weren’t for one of those free trips!
I’m glad to have had travel opportunities- it’s another way blogging has opened up my world. Each time I go away with other bloggers on these trips, it builds my blogging community because I inevitably meet wonderful and talented women who blog.
Love your ending…those shoes!!!
Kim a fellow BlogWhore
P.S. I’m running a giveaway next week. Stop by!
Kim/hormone-colored dayss last blog post..Matzah Mania
Um..can I just say that I really love those shoes.
PS: Thanks for the links. I’m off to check them out now.
Joannes last blog post..Sites And Blogs That Link To Us
your post is a good one.
and of an adorable bichon. i must start writing about him. he’s my momma’s boy for sure. 
hee hee.
we all have moments of anger, jealousy, frustration, or anguish. no one knows what was really going on in that mind of that gal you referenced who wrote the negative comment. but all of us have had our buttons pushed and all of us have lashed out and looked back and wondered ‘goodness! what is wrong w/ me?”
we should be best friends and sisters b/c in a huge way, every single woman who blogs is paving the way for women to find their voice worldwide…and each one of us who writes our hearts out is enabling the societal wall that says ‘women’s voices don’t count’ to continue to be broken down. i really think what we’re doing today is promoting freedom for all women the world over for decades to come. do not change a thing about who you are or how you blog. it’s YOU. it’s ELIZABETH. it’s TABLEFORFIVE.
btw, awesome new layout. in a few days look what you do! you are fabulous, beautiful and being true to you……the only thing i would caution all of us including myself is to not get lost in the marketer’s attempts to use us….it’s fine in a way…but just don’t let those type of blogs make you ever neglect the real stuff you wanna say….market whatever you believe in…but make sure to always write the stories about what your daughter did to make you giggle or what your son did to make you feel blessed to have him…you know?
i’m not a mom yet. …of children. i’m a mom of many
anyhoo…..you go girl….and may i recommend some MBTs instead of ‘dem pumps? they’re much betta on your arches
huggs muchly, tre
tre ~s last blog post..A sponge, some pinesol, an ipod…and a renewed thought
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I am a reader of your blog…sometimes I don’t comment and sometimes I don’t visit for a few days at at time but I am always around here somewhere! I found your blog via MayasMom and I fell in love with it…and you! You inspired me to start my own blog! I don’t care about the diffrences between my blog and yours.
I feel that those who look down on you for what you are doing are just angry with themselves for not being where you are. They can’t handle that they sit home while you go on trips! Don’t let them get you down! Keep your chin up!!! Off to check out the links you left here!
beckys last blog post..Curtis update
Oh my… I am behind on my blog reading to have missed this…
I can’t believe people don’t have better things to complain about.
I would love to be given free trips places or sent free stuff. But, you know, that’s not why I blog — and that’s not why you blog either. It’s just a nice little perk.
If you don’t agree, just say “no thank you” to any offers and respect other’s decisions.
Geesh. My kids play in their sandbox just fine.
pz5wjj/mimis last blog post..The Magic Wardrobe
i’m sure you’ve read my post by now.. it might even be part of why you chose to write this post- but what i hope you do know is that i wasn’t pissed off in my post… i wasn’t mad, upset, bitter, or anything. i just genuinely wanted to know HOW people were getting invited places. cause see, i consider myself pretty kick ass and cool. but maybe that just doens’t come through on my blog. LOL. maybe i curse too much- maybe i’m not the “typical mom” and that’s fine cause truly, idon’t wanna be.
anyway, i just didn’t want you thinking that my posts were in any way begrudging everyone who gets free shit and free trips. i truly do think it rocks= i just want in on the action, dur. lol
jennsters last blog post..a constant reminder of the day.he.died
Perks are nice, but it’s the community of blogging and the interaction with people that you otherwise would not have known that make it special.
That being said, tell me what to say to Brenda Strong tomorrow night!
Kristins last blog post..Hollywood Fun & Games
I think those that complain are only upset they aren’t getting. I totally love reading reviews, in fact my hubby wanted to go to a movie this weekend and asked where to find reviews. He was going to check out movie review pages. I told him get the real ones, type in your movie into the blog search box and read real reviews from bloggers. at least they’ll be honest.
Can’t wait to read more of your stuff. :)Like you said, people will always love your stuff while others hate it. We can’t please everyone.
homemom3s last blog post..SimplyMobile Mom & Contest
Its my first time here and i really enjoyed your blog. Its sad but it seems more and more adults are acting like teenagers. You would think you wouldnt have to deal with the drama after you left highschool. If you dont like a site dont visit it, no need to get nasty.
I plan to come back here more often
Jenn, I left you a rather lengthy comment on your post
Margalit is wrong when she infers that there is some kind of secret blogger sisterhood that recommends each other for trips and free stuff. If there is, I don’t know anything about it. I just work my ass off, do my very best when I write a product review, pass out tons of business cards at BlogHer conferences, there’s really no “secret” that I’m not sharing!
I appreciated this post… Thank you!
I let the whiners and complainers get to me… I felt guilty for being a “Blog Whore.” I am guilty no more… I love the perks!
See you at BlogHer - I’m a volunteer this year, too!
Christines last blog post..My Book Fairy Oopsi
/cheer
Good for you!!!
*Marie*s last blog post.."In God We Trust" is True
The Internet is just like High School most of the time and it really gets discouraging. I hate how judgmental and arrogant some people can be!
Don’t let them get you down. As cliche as it sounds, I’m sure they’re just jealous because they’re not the ones being invited on trips and receiving free gifts.
allys last blog post..Scheduled
Christine-No more guilt! We should make t-shirts with that saying and some hooker heels LOL
Make sure to come right up to me at BlogHer and say it’s CHRISTINE, FROM DATES TO DIAPERS so I know it’s you!
Oh this is so cool (I think) that perhaps I might be able to redeem myself from our previous disagreement about PayPerPost.
There are several different and not as divergent as they first appear views on this.
First of all, you are probably right that you are simply never going to make “everybody” happy, because there is always something or some view that somebody will take that every decision is wrong to somebody. For example, as you point out, some have complained that you are “bragging” about your swag. Whatever. First of all, I suspect it has more to do with jealousy than anything else. Second, personally I give you major kudos for full disclosure (my original whining point about PayPerPost).
In the end, so long as you do what is right for you, and stay true to who you are, those that value your opinion will be back even if they do eventually disagree. Those that don’t… pffft! They come to whine, to complain, because that is what they enjoy doing. Who has time for that?
JayMonsters last blog post..Friday Foccacia
Mom101-Hey, I haven’t written about the lint in my belly button in ages! Thanks for the idea
I’m glad you are on my side on this topic, I’ll remember that the next time I’m asked to “recommend someone” for a free trip 
MGM-But we have to pinky swear that we are not a part of a “secret society” of mean girl bloggers who only recommend each other for free trips, okay? lol
Anna, you are so sweet. If those of you who have never met me in person knew just what a dork I really am…Blog Friends are AWESOME!
I think I’ve probably said this before when you have posted with your debate over posting product reviews, etc., but I’ll say it again.
This is YOUR blog. YOU write what YOU want. If people don’t like it, they don’t have to read it.
If the proverbial path you choose in the blog world results in receiving free trips, merchandise or whatever else, that’s the way it goes.
Jay- It’s interesting that you bring up PayPerPost because, while the requests I get for product reviews are increasing, I find I’m less interested in paid blogging because it isn’t targeted specifically to this blog and it’s main topics. I could be monetizing the heck out of this site and making hundreds of dollars a month, but I know what the trade-off is, and I’m not interested. I learned my lesson after last year! I’d rather earn less but have Table for Five stand for quality posts on topics that I choose.
I’m glad we’ve worked past that whole thing and that you stopped by to comment!
R-And it would be nice if everyone felt like you do! I’m not even the one getting the nasty comments, but this is a community, and I can’t stand by while someone posts flat-out lies and calls other bloggers mean names, and not say something! I have always appreciated your support :).
One of the things that I don’t like about blogging (I’m relatively new to doing this consistently) is how “high school” and petty things can get. I say “to each their own” in regards to how you run your blog - as long as it’s not obviously exploiting anyone.
Kimberly Colemans last blog post..Cool Mom Picks; Work it Mom!; Savvy Source; Mommy Mastermind
Thanks for the support. And I luv your clear heels.
Amen. I’ve been on both sides of the fence - I am a mom blogger but I also work in PR and have reached out to bloggers for support of events or products. There is a lot that goes into finding the right bloggers but it is not a science and luck plays a major factor.
As a blogger I’ve gotten to review lots of cool products and I’ve been flattered when most of the companies (some were weirdos) reached out to me. I did not cry because I wasn’t on the Sony List or because I didn’t get the call to go to baby camp. I don’t hate my friend Susan because she was invited, either. We just need to be happy for each other.
Shannanb aka Mommy Bitss last blog post..Ignorant Brilliance!
Shannan-Even the people I’ve chatted with who were on the Sony list aren’t sure why they were on the list! lol And the Baby Camp invite was supposedly a huge mass mailing but it still missed me.
I’m also still flattered when a new P.R. agency emails me with some great product they’d like me to try. I know from talking to another blogger who is familiar with P.R. that there is a lot more stuff and money out there to be shared than most realize. I want the P.R. agencies to look upon bloggers as a valuable marketing resource, not as a bunch of sniping ingrates, you know? Thanks so much for the comment!
dorothy-*snicker* I found that image on Google and couldn’t resist
Best of luck with the book, I’m looking forward to reading it!
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