It’s not that I don’t like visiting my husband’s biological father and his wife in Indiana. The guest bed has two mattresses, the top one filled thickly with down and covered with a heavy, handmade quilt guaranteed to get even the most stubborn insomniac to sleep. There’s a big yard, a huge park across the street, and the nearby gas station has surprisingly good pizza. A visit to their house means choosing whether to sit in a lawn chair in the shady front yard or on a cushioned bench on the upstairs sunporch. Visitors are welcome to relax and unwind, no pressure to do anything but just be.
So why, then, am I here at home alone while my husband and kids made the drive down to Indiana this morning? The truth is, I like spending time alone. Always have. I go to movies alone, I go to restaurants alone (as long as I have a book or magazine to read), and occasionally, I like to hang out at home alone. And my husband knows that. After 24 years together, he’s become an expert at knowing when my stress level is reaching critical mass.
Sometimes, he comes home from work, rounds up the kids and takes them out to eat, and sometimes he works it out so that he and the kids can drive down to his father’s house and stay overnight. It’s amazing how much 36 hours of having absolutely nothing to worry about can do for my state of mind.
So, it’s Saturday, and I’m alone. They left at 10:30 and by 1:30, when I sat down to write this out longhand with one of my son’s pencils in a ruled notebook I found buried under a pile of mail on my desk, I had watched an entire DVD without have to pause or rewind. While watching the bonus features, I flipped through four magazines and tore out interesting articles to read later so I could recycle the rest. I found all of the pieces to a puzzle my daughter left lying on the coffee table, and stacked it along with three books on her bedroom bookshelf. I opened and sorted a big pile of mail.
And then I drove myself to Wendy’s for a coffee toffee twisted frosty that I did not have to share with anyone.
Tonight, the evening is mine. I could go to the movies, or I could take myself out to eat. I could go to Barnes & Noble and spend as much time as I want flipping through paperbacks without having to sit on a tiny chair in the children’s section watching my daughter play with the same trains she has at home.
I could get sweet and sour shrimp and spring rolls from the take out place up the street and watch the Buffy episode “Once More With Feeling”, turn it up as loudly as I want, and sing along to all the songs without anyone rolling their eyes at me, and without having to share the fortune cookies.
It’s Saturday night, and I’m home alone. Once in a while, it’s what I call the perfect evening.
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Twitter: BeckyDMBR
says:
That’s a great ending.
Ahhhhh, alone time.
I was just saying how I can’t understand why I agreed to leave my house tonight when I could be home enjoying some of those TV channels I pay way too much for.
Staying home and not having to take a vote on what to watch is definitely a perfect evening in my book!
Let me know when the shrimp and spring rolls get there, I’ll be over. Prepare to be dazzled by my vocal abilities
Twitter: Table4Five
says:
I would totally invite you over for chinese food and a Buffy sing along if I could!
So,my husband mentioned coffee toffee twisted frostys today…and I resisted, like a good dieter…but now, I don’t think I can. It seems like fate, really, and who am I to mess with that?
Twitter: carogonza
says:
I love it! You sound a lot like me. I love being alone as well. The quiet, the stillness, the doing what I want when I want. It’s heaven. And my suggestion is go get some yummy spring rolls, put on your jammies, watch Buffy (i am so jealous because that’s one of m favorite shows in the whole wide world) and then have a yummy dessert!!
Have a fantastic evening.
Twitter: bcmom
says:
I like being alone, at home. I don’t really like going out alone, though. I think I’ve seen one movie by myself ever – Interview with the Vampire>/i> when it came out.
Anyway, it sounds like a great way to spend a weekend once in a while, and then you can be happy to see the family when they come home.
This is a great site that you have here. I look forwarding to reading some more sometime in the future. I have a debate site myself that I would like you to check out when you get the chance. I would love to hear some of your thoughts on some controversial topics. Keep up the good work. Jason
Twitter: debmomof3
says:
Ooh, sounds wonderful. I’m so glad that you got the time to enjoy by yourself!
I totally know where you’re coming from!! I love my laptop and rent grown-up movies (pretty much anything that isn’t a cartoon) that my husband doesn’t want to watch (chick flicks) and watch them on my computer when the kids are sleeping. It’s wonderful! I’ve been daydreaming about going to a real movie theater by myself sometime. Maybe I’ll do it soon!
Hey,
I came across your site and would like to inform you about a debate that is going on about companies marketing towards children. Thought maybe we could hear your insight on this:
http://www.debateitout.com/should-companies-market-to-children.html
Take care. Jason
I totally understand! Especially since hubby and I work together every day too.
I so hear you! Always enjoyed my solitude, even as a kid – I was never bored, always read, and don’t have a problem being alone at all. Some people just don’t understand the need for personal space.
sometime being lonely is so nice. away from wife and kids
Oh, that sounds SO perfect! I hope you enjoyed every second.
Oh, I can’t wait until I can pawn off the kids on various grandmas or something and get the house to myself for a day or two (with or without the hubby, either way). Ah well. In 3-5 years I suppose…
Wish I could have one day being all alone. But that’s not possible in my situation right now. Sigh! Your post brings back memories of my singlehood and prior to motherhood days.