alternate title: What do you think? Should I send her the money?

This lovely email just hit my inbox. The sender is kdubois1@gmail.com, which I’m sure is a totally legitimate email address belong to a real, live person. Because gosh, gmail wouldn’t let spammers get an email address, right? Here’s her urgent plea:

Hello,

I am in a hurry writing you this mail. I traveled to UK wales for an urgent function and i got mugged at a gun point. It was a terrible experience. All cash and credit cards were stolen away from me. I reported to the police they asked me to wait for 2 weeks to carry out investigations. I am totally freaked out here.

Right now, my return flight leaves 24hours from now. I am only telling you this because i do not want you to panic at all. just keep it the way have told you till i return back home.

I am seriously having problems in settling my hotel bills which i have to clear before i can leave the hotel to avoid further embarrassment and to get a taxi down to the airport. Just wondering if you could loan me 2000Pounds to settle my bills and to get a taxi down to the airport. I promise to pay back when i return back home today.

Please you can help me send the money to my name and my present location because i am only left with my passport to pick up the money.

Name: Kate DuBois

Address: Colwyn Bay, Clwyd LL28 4EP UK

Do let me know if you will be going to the western union outlet right now to send the money to my name and my present location and please dont forget to get back to me with the transfer details which is the senders information and the MTCN number.

I await your urgent response.

Thanks so much and sorry to bother you.

Good heavens, that does sound important, doesn’t it? She couldn’t even remember that I live in the UNITED STATES and my money is called DOLLARS. She’s obviously so frazzled she forgot that little detail in her otherwise perfect email.

Just how long has this vacation been, this vacation to UK WALES, that her hotel bill is almost 2000 pounds, which I think is like, a LOT of dollars.

You know I had to Google it.

2000 British Pounds Sterling is equal to 3188.6000 Dollars. Wow, me and this Kate DuBois must be best friends for her to think I just have that much money lying around and her safety is of my utmost concern.

But wait! If her “return flight leaves 24hours from now”, how can she “promise to pay back when i return back home today”? She won’t be home until tomorrow! I know there’s a time zone difference and all, but she can’t come back in time to repay this debt. Can she?

Best of luck, “Kate”. Unfortunately, I suspect that someone in the millions of people you sent this email to will be gullible enough to think that yes, maybe they do know you, and gee whiz, they’d better send you that money right away.