I can’t believe I forgot to tell you that when I was in Chicago, I stood just a few feet away from a TV and movie star in the lobby of a hotel! And I was too chicken to say “excuse me, but I am a BIG fan of yours! I watched every episode of ___, and I just saw you in ___ the other day. Gosh, I don’t have any paper, would you autograph, oh, I don’t know, my BOOB?”

Who did I see? No no, not yet. You have to get the whole story first. See, the city of Chicago has two hotels with the same name-Chicago City Center. The “W” hotel chain had theirs first, and then the Holiday Inn got a new owner or something and changed their name to the same damn thing. I don’t know how that is possible, why there wasn’t a lawsuit or something, but maybe it’s not illegal to call your hotel the same thing as another hotel three blocks away.

Anyway, so the Thursday that I arrived in Chicago, I had just about 90 minutes before I had to be at speaker training, as did my train companion, Joy and my roommate Dana, so we asked the bellman at our hotel, the “W” Lakeshore, to please get us a cab to the “Chicago City Center”. He hails a cab, and tells the driver to take us to the “Chicago City Center”. I can only assume that because we were coming out of one “W” hotel, the driver assumed we wanted to go to the OTHER “W” hotel, the “W” Chicago City Center.

So we pulled up to the hotel, Joy paid the driver (she had a nice expense account for the weekend, and THANK YOU AGAIN, Joy) and we walked into the lobby of the “W” Chicago City Center. We had a feeling right away that we were in the wrong place-no people wearing the BlogHer pins, no signs or anything. Joy walked up to the front desk and asked if we were in the right hotel, and was told no. So, terrific. While Joy and Dana were talking to the desk clerk, getting the location of the other City Center hotel, I sort of wandered over to the middle of the lobby. I saw a very large man walking towards me wearing the gold nametag of hotel security, plus two other men walking with him.

I wasn’t really paying attention to the actual conversation, something about did they enjoy their stay at the hotel, did they enjoy whatever it was they had been doing in Chicago-I was too busy listening to one of the men’s voices and figuring out pretty quickly who he was. His voice is distinctive, plus, when you’ve watched every episode of the TV show he starred on at least half a dozen times, you remember the voice. Now, did I politely interrupt to tell him how much I enjoy his acting? How cute I think he is? Um, no. And I should have! My husband says he probably wouldn’t have minded waiting while I got a piece of hotel stationery for him to sign or something, but I didn’t. I just watched him and his friend walk out of the hotel, and then walked up to the security guard and said “Was that __ ?” And it was!

Sigh. I could have had him sign SOMETHING, but I chickened out. We could have had a moment, but oh well. At least it made being at the wrong hotel more pleasant for me! And that is the true story of how I saw J. August Richards in Chicago.

If you saw me at BlogHer two weeks ago (it’s been two weeks? I still have a bag I haven’t even unpacked), you would probably agree with my friend Landismom that I have the Power of Schmooze, right? I have never had a problem talking to people, whether I know them or not. At BlogHer I talked to people in the elevator, people waiting for the shuttle bus, people standing in line getting their breakfast, I talked to everybody, I think.But schmoozing is about more than just talking to people, it’s about making connections. The definition of the word according to the Merriam Webster Dictionary, is “to chat in a friendly and persuasive manner especially so as to gain favor, business, or connection”. Now, I’m not saying that my intention with every person I spoke to was to only see what they could do for me, but I did meet several people just by striking up casual conversation who turned out to be P.R. reps for various companies. They took my card and asked if I would be interested in receiving free products for review, and I’ve already lined up my first job, reviewing a new DVD series from Discovery Kids and ReadySetLearn!.

So yes, I did do some schmoozing at BlogHer, and yes, it did gain me some business connections. It also helped me meet a lot of terrific people! Friday morning at breakfast, we stood in two giant circles facing each other, for “speed dating”. I chatted and passed out business cards as fast as I could, and met Jennifer Lawson a/k/a Mama Drama, who I probably would have looked for all weekend and never found! I also got to chat for a moment with Christine Kane, who came as our musical guest for Friday night’s cocktail reception, and gave everyone a copy of her CD in our swag bag. She is so pretty, and so talented! I loved hearing her play live, and I love the CD too.

So, thanks for the award, Landismom! I now have to bestow it upon five other people.

MammaLoves, because she not only worked it at BlogHer, she worked it with an undiagnosed BROKEN FOOT. I’m so glad we met, I’m reading her blog every day now!

Chirky, who used her ability to schmooze people to get the “Speaker Wrangler” job for BlogHer. She had to get all of us our information about where and when to be, organized conference calls, and was available at the conference for help. She did a great job!

Mommy Needs Coffee, who decided the Monday before BlogHer to go, and was on a plane by Wednesday. She might not think of herself as a schmoozer, but she so is. She met authors! She’s writing a book! She rocks.

IzzyMom, who seemed to be everywhere at BlogHer, and looked like a gorgeous Rock Star the whole time. Thanks for throwing that kick-ass party at the Whiskey Sky with Jessica, and for getting us free drinks and free swag! You really worked it at BlogHer, Izzy!

Moosh in Indy, my newest blog crush. I’ll admit I didn’t know her until she found my profile on Peopleized and contacted me about interviewing me (we still need to do your interview, Casey!), but once I met her at BlogHer, I wanted to put her in my pocket and bring her home. If you look at my Flickr page, there’s photos of her eating cotton candy on Saturday, with her tongue all blue. She’s pretty hot! :p

I’ll be leaving a comment with each of them letting them know they have won a “Major Award”, and they will pass it to five people, and so on, and so on, and so on. Thanks again, Landismom!

The Power of Schmooze award was created and designed by Pink Reviews, and Things by Mike.

When BlogHer announced the venue for the conference earlier this Spring, they also asked for suggestions about panel topics. I sent in a suggestion for a “Blogging for Beginners” session, because when I was first starting out, I could have really used personal help. I remember how intimidating it is to sign up for a blog and then look at the dashboard and think “now what?”   Elisa emailed me back and said “great idea, which blogging platform are you familiar with?”  I said Wordpress, and she replied that  if I was interested, they might ask me to volunteer to help with the session.

I assumed that it meant that I might be on hand to answer questions afterwards, so imagine my surprise when she said no, you will be our “Wordpress Guru” and teach new bloggers to start a hosted Wordpress blog! I was flabbergasted, as my Mother would say, because those of you who have been reading a long time know how many questions I have had to ask, how much help I have asked for, and now for me to be the one answering the questions-I really wasn’t sure I could do it, even as I walked into the session on Saturday morning.

Well, I did. I had a great group of ladies show up wanting to set up Wordpress blogs, including one young lady from Germany who told me that her country had sent her to the conference because they knew how important blogging can be! How cool is that!  I met Ursula,  and Colleen, and I met Vicki.

Vicki is formerly from Michigan, she has degrees from U of M and family in the U.P., and she works at the Lincoln Park Zoo as a Docent. She had a blog set up on TypePad, but she didn’t want to continue paying for it every month and wasn’t sure if Wordpress would be the right choice. I helped her create her account, and then she asked for more personal help once the conference was over. Working from lots of emails and phone calls, I have moved all of her TypePad files over to Wordpress, and helped her set up A Mark On My Wall.  Don’t you love the Ocean Mist theme? So pretty.

Today, Vicki is having major surgery including general anesthesia, which is why I worked so hard all day yesterday to get her blog running so she wouldn’t have to worry about it.  Please keep her in your thoughts, send positive healing vibes her way or say a prayer if that’s your thing. We might be strangers to her, but the power of the Blogosphere can be a mighty force when it is channelled in someone’s direction. Good luck today, Vicki, and don’t worry about your blog. Your site admin is taking good care of it

To everyone who commented (and re-commented) on my last post, thank you. Thank you for adding your voice to the discussion. Maybe someone at BlogHer will take note and make monetization a larger part of next year’s discussion topics. I want to move on to a new subject, but before I do, I want to reiterate one important point: I did not say, nor do I believe, that Chris Jordan should not have made her very brief comment about PayPerPost during the panel session. Being a BlogHer sponsor did not give anyone immunity from any kind of criticism, if that’s what it was. Chris has left me two very well written comments and sent me an email, and I understand her position regarding PayPerPost quite well. What’s more, I agree with her, for the most part.

If you are a brand new blogger, looking to earn some income, and you write about technology, business, or health, PayPerPost could be a good resource for you. If, however, you have established and proudly declared yourrself to be a Mommyblogger, then suddenly writing about technology, business, and health (and by health, I mean hair transplants and liposuction) is going to come across as disingenuous, no matter how carefully you write the posts.

I am no longer going to allow others to dictate what I can and can’t have in my content, on my sidebars, or anywhere else on this blog. It’s MINE. I pay the hosting, I do the work, I am the editor, the manager, the proofreader, the copywriter. I won’t accept paid link or review assignments that don’t meet my standards, and I won’t run ads or join ad networks that don’t meet my standards, either. It’s all about ME, ME, ME.

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Now, BlogHer itself. For those of you who didn’t attend, and are still wondering what the heck a blogging conference is like, I’ll tell you- it is amazing. Even if you don’t think you would want to spend two days in conference rooms talking about blogging, how would you like to get pampered from morning ’til night? How would you like to not have to fix breakfast, lunch or snacks, have free beverages and more snacks whenever you desire them, have free Wi-Fi access, get more free sponsor gifts than you’ll be able to carry in one trip, and stay in a very nice hotel? How would you like to attend cocktail receptions with entertainment, waiters passing trays of delicious appetizers, and free drinks?

Oh yeah, and you get to spend two days with other bloggers. People who “get” you. People with whom you can discuss blogging without being asked what a “blob” is. It’s your chance to let your inner geek flag fly, baby, and it is FUN. I said it last year and I’ll say it this year too, everyone should go!

I got so much free swag that I couldn’t get it all into one photo, so here’s the first one:

I think my favorite swag from this group was the items from Revolution Health. T-shirts for each of my kids, a pedometer, and a small pouch that velcros onto your shoe to hold your house key while you are out exercising. But wait! There’s more!

At bottom right you can see this year’s version of last year’s “why the hell did you give us a bib?” gift, the Butterball Hot pad. Butterball turkey was a sponsor, and gosh, are they trying to make a statement that women should stay in the kitchen? NO. At least I don’t assume so. I assume that they are saying if you are in the kitchen, cooking, and you need a hot pad, why not think of the Butterball company as you are pulling your creation out of the oven? It’s product placement, pure and simple.

Next year, I want to take some kind of gift. It was fun to get something personalized from people. I missed Kristen’s condom “lollipops” and Mothergoosemouse’s glow stick necklace, but I did get Kari’s flashing duck and my favorite, Jen Lemen’s whole gift package:

What beautiful art work. And yummy chocolate, which my son ate most appreciatively! I’ve got other stories I can tell, about the party at the Whiskey Sky, Friday night’s Walk of a Thousand Cuts on my Feet, and Saturday’s Fun at the Navy Pier. Plus, I’ll catch you up on what my kids have been doing. And, I’ll keep trying to reply to all of your wonderful comments. I’ve MISSED you, my dear readers, and I’m so glad it’s not too late to get you back.

It takes a lot to make me spontaneously burst into tears. Last Friday, I had to get up and leave the State of the Momosphere session at BlogHer because I felt the tears coming, and come they did, before I even left the room. Why? Because when I feel as passionate about something as I do about this topic, it hurts me to hear it put down by people who don’t have actual experience with it at all. That’s right, I’m talking about PayPerPost. PayPerPost was the only paid blogging site invited to be a sponsor at BlogHer ‘07, and do you know why? To paraphrase Lisa Stone, it’s because they are the only one who pays bloggers what they are worth, pays them on time, provides excellent customer support, and provides exceptional community support. But the words PayPerPost spoken at BlogHer were the equivalent of admitting that you enjoy poking yourself in the eyes with sharp needles. The topic of monetization was brought up at the session, and the moderator (Jory Des Jardins, one of the BlogHer founders) asked a question along the lines of “so, what shouldn’t you do for money?” Chris Jordan-a blogger whom I feel a friendship with and whose writing I really enjoy-said “you shouldn’t write for PayPerPost!”. I felt like I had been stabbed in the chest. I turned around in my seat because I knew my roommate Liz was standing behind me, and I just looked at her, and she looked at me, and then I turned back around, folded my hands, and concentrated on breathing deeply. Meanwhile, the session was continuing with more discussion about how bloggers of color do not generally get approached to place ads or write reviews, and a woman standing behind me made a joke about how she would be happy to accept laundry detergent. Jory asked something along the lines of “what products wouldn’t you accept?” and someone yelled out “Swiffers!” It’s well-known here on this blog that I got started writing product reviews after I wrote a post titled “I Love Swiffer, yes I do”, and was contacted by a P.R. firm in nearby Ann Arbor who was doing an online campaign for a new design of the Swiffer Sweeper. They asked me if they could send me one in exchange for my writing about it on my blog, and I was thrilled. Someone read something I wrote, and liked it enough to want to hear my opinion on something else? That was pretty damn cool. So. I’m already feeling the pressure of three months of trying not to apologize for becoming a paid blogger- actually, the term at BlogHer was “professional blogger”, then I’m hearing someone make a negative comment about them. Because I had been to Speaker Training, I knew that the “rules” for panel discussions said that if someone made a negative comment, the moderator was supposed to ask for the opposite opinion. Hands were flying up all over the room and I was in the very back, and it wasn’t likely that I was going to be able to get called on. The discussion was continuing, and I was sitting there feeling this big bubble of emotion rising in my chest, and I suddenly knew I had to get up and go call my husband. I was walking to the door and the wonderful Busy Mom was standing there, and she asked me if I was okay. As soon as I opened my mouth to say “no, and I need to call my husband”, the tears burst forth. I walked out into the hallway and started shaking with sobs. And then I got his voicemail and had to leave him a sobby message, which just made him worry. I walked down into the Sponsors Exhibit Hall, and Liz called me and said “stay right there, we’re coming to you”. Having her and Dana want to come find me and make sure I was okay made me feel so much better. They wanted me to go right back and talk to Jory, but she had already left. I was able to speak to Lisa Stone on Saturday, and that’s when she reminded me that Chris had the right to her opinion, and that panelists are free to speak on any subject related to their session, and I totally agree. I’m not angry with Chris Jordan, if she doesn’t like PayPerPost, that is her opinion. What upset me is that the comment was made, and about a sponsor no less, and no one stood up and made a positive comment in response. Including me. I wish I had just jumped up and said “hey, wait a minute”, but I couldn’t. Liz from Mom-101 also mentioned PayPerPost in her panel session on Saturday, and here’s what I think bloggers at her level don’t understand- she might be selling BlogAds, she might be getting paid for focus groups, and to write on other sites, but bloggers at my level generally are not. In a year, I might be at that level and then I might not be writing for PayPerPost any more, I don’t know. But to say that I am devaluing myself as a blogger because I will take $15.00 to write 200 words is just plain wrong in my opinion. I am not so high up in the Blogosphere that I can say no to $15.00. In a post today, Liz mentions getting small items in exchange for reviews, like when Hass MS&L sent me a free roll of Bounty Paper Towel when they were doing the One-sheet challenge. I had a LOT of fun writing that paper towel review over on MomReviews, and I always need paper towel. Plus, sometimes it’s paper towel, and sometimes it’s a free 10.5 inch portable DVD player. You take the reviews for the products that interest you, and you say no thank you to the ones that don’t. Also, no one was saying anything about Parent Blogger Network, for whom I also work, and that probably would have made me cry too! Those are free samples, although there is often compensation in the form of cash or an Amazon gift certificate as well, for which I am VERY GRATEFUL. I have bought CDs, DVDs, and a cool Dora the Explorer toy for Kaitlyn with my PBN money. I LIKE doing reviews, and I LIKE getting stuff in exchange! That being said, I did do a lot of hard thinking this weekend about what kinds of reviews I will do. To raise the money I needed for BlogHer, I pretty much took any opp I could get through PayPerPost as long as it paid well (by “well”, I mean it paid $8-$20). I wrote about whatever the topic was, and I did it for the money. After spending a lot of time at BlogHer talking to two of PPP’s sales directors, Joe Vaughn and Robb Leeland, I realized that PPP doesn’t WANT me to take opps just for the money. When they say “Get Paid to blog about the Things You Love”, they mean it. They want you to only take the opps that are for something you think your readers will want to learn more about. With that in mind, I will be trying to only take opps that relate to parenting and to helping us all with our blogging. That’s not to say that you might not see something different once in a while, but I am definitely NOT too good to take a $25.00 opp or more, that is a LOT of money in our household. I also cried Saturday night when I found out that I had missed getting my photo taken with Elizabeth Edwards at the cocktail party. She had to leave to catch a plane while I was sitting in the shuttle bus on Illinois Ave, stuck in traffic. I had run back to the hotel to drop off the twenty million tons of sponsor gifts I was carrying, and I thought it would be a quick trip there and back. I was wrong. Her assistant Tracy said to me “oh, she wanted to meet you!”, and I burst into tears. Again. Next year, I’m skipping the Mommyblogger session, and shipping all the sponsor stuff home via Fedex. There’s only so much stress I can handle.